|
March
2003 Guestbook
Current Guest
book
Sent: Saturday, March
01, 2003 9:56 AM
Subject: Molestation
I was so happy to find
this website. I am now 56 years old and have lived through hell.
I was sexually molested by my stepfather when I was very young.
I was brought up a JW and he was supposedly an upstanding minister
in this religion. Until I was out of the house, I kept this very
dark secret. No one was told. Through the years I kept this secret
and had a horrible life because of it. About 15 years ago I finally
"told" what had happened to me. The elders of this organization
were told about this man and did NOTHING! NOTHING was done to
this pedophile who professed to be a father and minister!!! I
am still on medication for depression because of all the years,
10 years old until I was 18!!!!!!!!!, of molestation by this monster.
He is still a JW!!! Good grief, my life has been pure hell and
that man still goes on with life.
Of course as a teen
I did many things I am ashamed of, but when you are molested at
a young age and don't tell anyone because you are so scared, you
do things because your mind has blocked out abuse. I have never
been able to have a happy relationship with anyone because of
the terrible nightmare of my young growing up years. This nightmare
cannot be erased. I still wake up in the night so petrified and
the nightmares will never end.
When I see a JW come
to my door, the anger is so real. I cannot talk to them and I
know it is not them but him. But I can't face them as they did
not punish him for what he did to me. Some of you can't understand
this, but most of you silent lambs can. I hope that any of you
young people out there who are being molested or abused will step
forward and fight so that you can have a happy life, not like
mine-terror, pain, nightmares, depression, anger, insomnia, physical
illness, mood swings and the list goes on and on, all because
of one horrible man. I will think of all of you and hope that
you will not be a silent lamb but an outspoken lion!
Sent: Sunday, March
02, 2003 6:01 PM
Subject: Molestation
Hello, you have come
to the right place to tell about your personal experience - -
many, many people here can relate to your pain and trauma. People
do understand here, so please keep coming back! I hope the support
and compassion you receive here will help you with your healing.
It took courage and strength to tell the elders what happened
to you at the hands of your stepfather! Keep speaking up. Maybe
you could even take this information about your abuse to someone
in the legal field. Of course, that would be something to check
out with Bill Bowen, as he is the one who is dealing with the
pedophilia situation. I hope, though, that there are some options
available for you, so that something can and will be done about
the person who basically ruined your life. Please hang in there,
and the more power to all of you victims and to Bill Bowen, who
has such courage to give so much of his time and energy to this
issue. You all have courage. It can't be an easy thing to do,
to face elders and others and put yourselves on the line, hoping
they will listen, believe you, and give you all the support and
encouragement you all need so much. Never give up. You are all
doing the right thing. Believe in yourselves, all of you, and
take good care.
Sent: Tuesday, March
04, 2003 12:46 PM
Subject: Guestbook entry
I am a former JW. I
was born and raised in the congregation and many, many of my family
members continue to be actively involved with the Witnesses. I
have never been able to have a meaningful relationship in my life
and have always felt isolated, alone, and shameful. I was abused,
both sexually and emotionally, for many years, and though my parents
were aware of the abuse, they did nothing for fear of reprisal
from the WT. The anger that I carry and sense of betrayal is enormous.
When I bring up the abuse that takes place in the Kingdom Hall
with family members, their answers are all the same, as though
the Watchtower has told them exactly how to respond to such questions:
"Yes, I heard of such stories, but they are not true. The
Watchtower does not condone abuse and will actively investigate
and see to the prosecution of anyone who abuses a child. "
I now realize that these members no longer have the ability to
think for themselves and must look to the WT to be told what to
think and what to believe. Maybe someday I will be able to tell
my story, not yet, but maybe someday. Thank you for giving us
a forum for our thoughts and feelings.
Sent: Tuesday, March
04, 2003 11:11 PM
Subject: Molestation
I am glad you found
this site. It was a very healing thing for me to find out I wasn't
alone. I have read around this board when I first started coming
here, and it was very healing for me. I don't know if it would
be for you, but just know you are very brave for going to the
elders. They don't make it easy, and they aren't very kind when
you do.
Just know this, to do
things in your childhood that you regret is just a way of acting
out. I have been to therapy because of my molesting uncle. I hope
you find a source to get things out, it helps. I hope you find
this a good place to talk and share as well. I will be looking
in to see if you are ok.
Love,
Jesika Thoman, Dallas-Tx
Sent: Wednesday, March
05, 2003 6:14 PM
Subject: Molestation
I too was raised a JW
and I was molested by my father from the time I was 4 to about
9 years old. Sadly, I never told anyone until I was 23 year old.
I was in active in the organization at the time but I went to
the elders for help. I was an emotional mess. I went to my sister
and told her my dark secret and she directed me to the Elders.
The elders treated me with kindness and showed mercy on my soul.
I was not DF'd only privately reproved for my immoral behavior.
I was involved with a couple of worldly boys and I confessed all.
What upset me was the fact that they made it very clear to my
father that he was not being DF'd for molesting me but it was
for his excessive drinking. My father is an alcoholic and has
been one ever since I can remember. I tried to continue going
to meetings but the thought that it is okay for a person to molest
children but it is not okay for them to get drunk at home every
night. The excuse for! not DF'ng him for molestation was that
it was so long ago. What is that! Craziness! My father even admitted
it to the Elders! And still they did nothing on that matter!
I am so glad people
are speaking out. There is so much abuse that happens to children
every day and the JW organization is clearly not free of it. Keep
up your good work! I believe in my heart you truly are pleasing
our creator (if there is one. . . . . I struggle with doubts) by protecting
innocent children and helping victims that are now adults to heal
there minds and hearts.
Love,
melancholyblue
Sent: Thursday, March
06, 2003 5:09 PM
Subject: the mole
the mole. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . and
elder has stepped down in Sacramento. . . . not anything new but here
is the situation. . . the elder in our local area was caught trying
to date a young sister, when found out by the young girls friends
many began to ask what was going on. . the elder had lied and said
it was only friendship. . after these last two weeks of rumors floating
around it came to my attention that he was sleeping with the young
girl aged 17. . this brother is 34 years old and just separated
with his wife. . the girl and this brother had been seeing each
other almost two years and none of us knew of it. . . I the mole
inquired if this man was to be jailed for statutory rape or fined
being that she was under age. . the parents where told it is a judicial
matter for the congregation alone and not a police matter. . . here
is another example of the kingdom halls taking civil issues into
their own hand. . . the brothers are trying to cover it up by giving
talks in their hall about gossip. . . all of you who come to this
site should know there are many forms of abuse especially those
who take the lead in the church and use that power to sway young
minds. . . . ***the mole***
Sent: Saturday, March
08, 2003 2:30 AM
Subject: Send from Denmark
I have been reading
this site since 21 December 2001. The site is a healing place.
My wife has been raped
by her father from 4 years and to her 12 year, It ended with she
got pregnant, and her father killed the little girl when it was
born. The raping my wife has repressed, and so have our son, my
wife sister and her daughter, The elder try to frighten us from
going to the police, the P. O. said, well I don't think you wanna
go to the police because if you do the reports will come like
a swarm. My wife did called the police, and they spend a half
year, but couldn't find the baby, they dug on the farm 30 men
in 3 days, and on a church yard, but they couldn't find the body.
And the incest was to old by law. Then the elders look on the
matter, and they say that my wife's father is an innocent man
and that he is fine man. And that my wife and sister are liars.
HT
Sent: Friday, February
28, 2003 10:48 PM
Subject:
This site is amazingly
tasteful. I have been out of the organization for 5 or 6 years
now and I despise the mud slinging, vindictive and woe is me that
dominates most sites. You stick to the point and focus on the
topic relevant to your cause. I refuse to exchange one form of
fanaticism for another. I admire your ability to do the same.
You are better at it than I would be. Thank-you for providing
this site for people without fanning the flames of their already
scorching pain. I was abused as a witness too. I never looked
up any sites because I was afraid of the melodrama. Too bad I
didn't know about this one. TS
| Hans |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 10:10 AM |
The new look
I have just seen the new look on the site, and I think its
great. Nordic. |
|
| silentlambs |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:03 PM |
guestbook fixed
We have had some problems with the guestbook since opening
the new website and it has been repaired. If you posted any
information since last Thursday it was lost. If you repost
we will be glad to put it up. Thank you for your patience
as we get the bugs worked out of the new site. silentlambs
|
|
| Will |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:08 PM |
i studied with the JWs"s for 7 months. 7 months isn't a very
long time but it was longing enough for me to be contemplating
suicide. i fell in love with a JW woman and and for a year
i was kept a secret from the the brothers and sisters of her
fellowship. it made me fell like the smallest person on earth.
i kept asking myself how can this be showing gods love? i
would ask my girlfriend questions that she could not answer.
and the only way to get answers is to go and study so i could
better understand. so that's what i did. i believe i was manipulated
and lied to. nothing made sense. i would ask questions about
certain beliefs and i was talked in circles until i was speechless.
i was told just hand in there it will make sense, " its like
a puzzle, you finish the outside then fill it in from there".
the jws were giving me no foundation to there beliefs. i kept
studying and going to the kingdom hall because i was deeply
in love with my JW girlfriend. i believe that she too was
molested as a child and is still keeping all that pain inside.
Jesus Christ is the Light of the world unfortunately the JWs
beliefs have taken the light of the world and made it somewhat
dark. i will pray for all the people who have been abused
sexually, emotionally, spiritually and mentally. |
|
| Lee |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:12 PM |
molestation
I was so happy to find this website. I am now 56 years old
and have lived through hell. I was sexually molested by my
stepfather when I was very young. I was brought up a JW and
he was supposedly an upstanding minister in this religion.
Until I was out of the house, I kept this very dark secret.
No one was told. Through the years I kept this secret and
had a horrible life because of it. About 15 years ago I finally
"told" what had happened to me. The elders of this organization
were told about this man and did NOTHING! NOTHING was done
to this pedophile who professed to be a father and minister!!!
I am still on medication for depression because of all the
years, 10 years old until I was 18!!!!!!!!!, of molestation
by this monster. He is still a JW!!! Good grief, my life has
been pure hell and that man still goes on with life. Of course
as a teen I did many things I am ashamed of, but when you
are molested at a young age and don't tell anyone because
you are so scared, you do things because your mind has blocked
out abuse. I have never been able to have a happy relationship
with anyone because of the terrible nightmare of my young
growing up years. This nightmare cannot be erased. I still
wake up in the night so petrified and the nightmares will
never end. When I see a JW come to my door, the anger is so
real. I cannot talk to them and I know it is not them but
him. But I can't face them as they did not punish him for
what he did to me. Some of you can't understand this, but
most of you silent lambs can. I hope that any of you young
people out there who are being molested or abused will step
forward and fight so that you can have a happy life, not like
mine-terror, pain, nightmares, depression, anger, insomnia,
physical illness, mood swings and the list goes on and on,
all because of one horrible man. I will think of all of you
and hope that you will not be a silent lamb but an outspoken
lion! |
|
| Carl |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:14 PM |
molestation
Hello, you have come to the right place to tell about your
personal experience - - many, many people here can relate
to your pain and trauma. People do understand here, so please
keep coming back! I hope the support and compassion you receive
here will help you with your healing. It took courage and
strength to tell the elders what happened to you at the hands
of your stepfather! Keep speaking up. Maybe you could even
take this information about your abuse to someone in the legal
field. Of course, that would be something to check out with
Bill Bowen, as he is the one who is dealing with the pedophilia
situation. I hope, though, that there are some options available
for you, so that something can and will be done about the
person who basically ruined your life. Please hang in there,
and the more power to all of you victims and to Bill Bowen,
who has such courage to give so much of his time and energy
to this issue. You all have courage. It can't be an easy thing
to do, to face elders and others and put yourselves on the
line, hoping they will listen, believe you, and give you all
the support and encouragement you all need so much. Never
give up. You are all doing the right thing. Believe in yourselves,
all of you, and take good care. |
|
| JM |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:16 PM |
Guestbook entry
I am a former JW. I was born and raised in the congregation
and many, many of my family members continue to be actively
involved with the Witnesses. I have never been able to have
a meaningful relationship in my life and have always felt
isolated, alone, and shameful. I was abused, both sexually
and emotionally, for many years, and though my parents were
aware of the abuse, they did nothing for fear of reprisal
from the WT. The anger that I carry and sense of betrayal
is enormous. When I bring up the abuse that takes place in
the Kingdom Hall with family members, their answers are all
the same, as though the Watchtower has told them exactly how
to respond to such questions: "Yes, I heard of such stories,
but they are not true. The Watchtower does not condone abuse
and will actively investigate and see to the prosecution of
anyone who abuses a child. " I now realize that these members
no longer have the ability to think for themselves and must
look to the WT to be told what to think and what to believe.
Maybe someday I will be able to tell my story, not yet, but
maybe someday. Thank you for giving us a forum for our thoughts
and feelings. |
|
| JT |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:17 PM |
Molestation
I am glad you found this site. It was a very healing thing
for me to find out I wasn't alone. I have read around this
board when I first started coming here, and it was very healing
for me. I don't know if it would be for you, but just know
you are very brave for going to the elders. They don't make
it easy, and they aren't very kind when you do. Just know
this, to do things in your childhood that you regret is just
a way of acting out. I have been to therapy because of my
molesting uncle. I hope you find a source to get things out,
it helps. I hope you find this a good place to talk and share
as well. I will be looking in to see if you are ok. Love,
Jesika |
|
| Melancholyblue |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:19 PM |
molestation
I too was raised a JW and I was molested by my father from
the time I was 4 to about 9 years old. Sadly, I never told
anyone until I was 23 year old. I was in active in the organization
at the time but I went to the elders for help. I was an emotional
mess. I went to my sister and told her my dark secret and
she directed me to the Elders. The elders treated me with
kindness and showed mercy on my soul. I was not DF'd only
privately reproved for my immoral behavior. I was involved
with a couple of worldly boys and I confessed all. What upset
me was the fact that they made it very clear to my father
that he was not being DF'd for molesting me but it was for
his excessive drinking. My father is an alcoholic and has
been one ever since I can remember. I tried to continue going
to meetings but the thought that it is okay for a person to
molest children but it is not okay for them to get drunk at
home every night. The excuse for! not DF'ng him for molestation
was that it was so long ago. What is that! Craziness! My father
even admitted it to the Elders! And still they did nothing
on that matter! I am so glad people are speaking out. There
is so much abuse that happens to children every day and the
JW organization is clearly not free of it. Keep up your good
work! I believe in my heart you truly are pleasing our creator
(if there is one. . . . . I struggle with doubts) by protecting
innocent children and helping victims that are now adults
to heal there minds and hearts. Love, melancholyblue |
|
| the mole |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:20 PM |
the mole
the mole. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . and elder has stepped down in sacramento. . . . not
anything new but here is the situation. . . the elder in our
local area was caught trying to date a young sister, when
found out by the young girls friends many began to ask what
was going on. . the elder had lied and said it was only friendship. . after
these last two weeks of rumors floating around it came to
my attention that he was sleeping with the young girl aged
17. . this brother is 34 years old and just separated with his
wife. . the girl and this brother had been seeing each other
almost two years and none of us knew of it. . . I the mole inquired
if this man was to be jailed for statutory rape or fined
being that she was under age. . the parents where told it is
a judicial matter for the congregation alone and not a police
matter. . . here is another example of the kingdom halls taking
civil issues into their own hand. . . the brothers are trying
to cover it up by giving talks in their hall about gossip. . . all
of you who come to this site should know there are many forms
of abuse especially those who take the lead in the church and
use that power to sway young minds. . . . ***the mole*** |
|
| Hans |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:21 PM |
Molestation
I have been reading this site since 21 December 2001. The
site is a healing place. My wife has been raped by her father
from 4 years and to her 12 year, It ended with she got pregnant,
and her father killed the little girl when it was born. The
raping my wife has repressed, and so have our son, my wife
sister and her daughter, The elder try to frighten us from
going to the police, the po said, well i don't think you want to
go to the police because if you do the reporters will come
like a swarm. My wife did called the police, and they spend
a half year, but couldn't find the baby, they dig on the farm
30 men i 3 days, and on a church yard, but they couldn't find
the body. And the incest was to old by law. Then the elders
look on the matter, and they say that my wife's father is an
innocent man and that he is fine man. And that my wife and
sister are liars. |
|
| Tabithah |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:22 PM |
Your website
This site is amazingly tasteful. I have been out of the organization
for 5 or 6 years now and I despise the mud slinging, vindictive
and woe is me that dominates most sites. You stick to the
point and focus on the topic relevant to your cause. I refuse
to exchange one form of fanaticism for another. I admire your
ability to do the same. You are better at it than I would
be. Thank-you for providing this site for people without fanning
the flames of their already scorching pain. I was abused as
a witness too. I never looked up any sites because I was
afraid of the melodrama. Too bad I didn't know about this
one. Tabithah |
|
|
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:23 PM |
Just signing the guestbook
Susan K. Weidenbach |
|
| Cheri |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:24 PM |
Your website
Thank you so much for this site. There are so many cases of
abuse in my extended family. My niece was treated the same
way by elders of a Toledo Oregon Congregation and a lot of
the young people here. It was just heinous. My sisters are
mentally ill due to the molestation and rape of their young
bodies at the tender ages of 4 and 5. Another niece was molested
in West Virginia by a Presiding Overseer. Please tell me what
I can do to help you. Thank you, Cheri |
|
|
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:25 PM |
Your efforts
I am the Domestic Violence and Disabilities Educator for Pierce
County Washington, and I think your website is a real step
in the right direction of mutual support, self- advocacy,
and life change for those who have been victims of sexual
abuse. I have personally been a victim of sexual abuse. You
may be interested to know that statistics show that between
75 and 99% of individuals with disabilities have experienced
sexual abuse in their lives. I had the benefit of three years
in a self-help facilitated support group which was part of
the program of the Sexual Assault Center of Pierce County.
There, I was able to work through the emotions which stopped
me from experiencing normal sexuality. I admire self-help
organizations. My other had is as Program Manager of the Mental
Health Resource Center of the Tacoma Area Coalition of Individuals
with Disabilities. We do not address sexual abuse directly
because no one on our staff is certified as a therapist or
facilitator in this area. However, we do address this problem
in our Bipolar Support Groups, our Hope for Depression Group,
our Anxiety Support Group, and our Schizophrenia Support Group.
It has been my experience with Jehovah's Witnesses that many
JW's are people who live with disabilities of one sort or
another. I applaud your efforts. |
|
| Carl |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 8:40 PM |
I agree about some of the former Witness sites seeming melodramatic.
I think that just works against us. It's easy to understand
the feelings, but depending on how they are expressed, they
can either help or hinder the purpose of these sites. Coming
across like some tabloid magazine will only make former Witnesses
sound bitter and vengeful, which will defeat what these sites
are all about, supporting other ex-Witnesses and assisting
current Jehovah's Witnesses, who are floundering and drifting.
Keeping the sites more low key, yet straightforward seems
far more effective than the sites that excite a sort of 'mob
mentality'. They are more of a "turn off" in the long run.
Anyway, that's my two cents worth. I think this is a tasteful
site, too. |
|
| SLC |
Tuesday, March 18, 2003
@ 11:54 PM |
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
. . . to silentlambs & org on this new great website! It
has a nice clean layout, easy to navigate, well organized,
good looking and functional, too! not to mention all the informative/educational
info contained on the many pages! Keep up the good work! And
greetings to all the former lambs, the current lambs and all
the future lambs who will visit here in the future. Everyone
take care and see ya 'round the lamb-fests, the lamb-marches,
etc. ! /SLC |
|
| MPH |
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
@ 8:28 AM |
Congratulations!
Congratulations on the new site! |
|
| tk |
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
@ 12:43 PM |
Thanks to all
The New Silentlambs site is gorgeous! Sooooo much easier for
me. . . . but I'm computer challenged. I'm also a victim of decades
of violent child abuse - my father & his friends. I became
a JW and made friends with a Ministerial Servant with 5 kids
& good wife. I did check out their family before allowing
my child to visit at their house. We had known them for a
while. I was a mother of 3 kids with df'd husband - I wanted
"good christian" association for my kids. My child went to
their house and was sexually abused by this Ministerial Servant.
Years later, my child told me. I called the elders (I had
moved from that state) - they told me that the elders were
trying to meet with this man because his own daughter had
just written them details of years of rape by her father.
I called back within a month to PO. He said they never talked
with the brother. Why? The WT Society said "drop it. " They
did. My child never saw the man rape his daughter - nor did
his daughter claim to see him molest my child. Thus, no "two
witnesses to the same act" - which was WT Law at that time.
Maria, his daughter, as of 10 yrs. ago. , had been df'd two
times. My child once. The rapist/molester of these children
had complete freedom within the KH to hurt other kids. He
finally died. . . . . still "in good standing. " I reported him
to the police - if nothing else, please report all abuse even
if not proven. A "paper trail" is started with a name. Perhaps
some other parent/child will do the same - and the trail gets
easier to follow. Best wishes to all fellow victims/survivors.
|
|
| waiting (forum name) |
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
@ 1:08 PM |
Great site
Been looking through this new site - awesome! I'm not good
with a computer. . . . . . . and this is so much easier to maneuver
around through. Thanks! Will be back. . . . . . . . . . . . . . waiting
|
|
| CP |
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
@ 4:51 PM |
Ted Jaracz - Why His Silence?
Why doesn't he answer Pat Garza's public statement to the
press that he (the Worldwide Governing Body member nicknamed
"the Boss" at Brooklyn Bethel) molested her and others when
he was District Overseer of Jehovah's Witnesses in Los Angeles?
If it's false he should say so. If true then it's no wonder
he is such a coward. The Watchtower Society should remove
him instead of letting him stay on and direct local elders
fire at those who speak out again the cover ups of pedophilia,
the liaison with the U. N. while it was and is preached against,
and the like! |
|
| CP |
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
@ 4:54 PM |
Add This
Let me add this. I think you should ask those who want to
help to give you addresses of those who are still JWs, and
then Silentlambs can send them an informative letter, encouraging
them in turn to also report abuses. |
|
| smokeybear from Louisiana |
Wednesday, March 19, 2003
@ 8:47 PM |
First time visit
I enjoyed the website, and there is information to learn from
this site. I just wanted to know why doesn't the witnesses
have a T. v program for themselves, like others. Jehovah said
at the end of time that the world would know his name. People
in this world needs to know more facts and information on
the witnesses, and I think this would be a great opportunity
to have people view the real views on what the witnesses believe
in and why by the way of proof in the bible. Anyone who can
answer this information please feel free to give me answers
and can be forwarded to smokeybear49@juno. com. I am proud
to be a witness and I want the World to know that we are the
true religion and what we speak about is all facts. |
|
| Claudine |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 10:52 AM |
Great Looking Web Site
Wow! What a surprise! The website looks very very nice. Great
image, extremely professional looking. Beautiful! Got myself
exhausted, so I have had to go into hiding, doing as little
as possible. I hope everyone is well and hanging in there.
I am going to go and take a look around now. . . see you later.
Love, Claudine |
|
| Charles |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 10:58 AM |
Washington State Laws
Would like everyone to know that, a mandatory reporting law
is in the works in Washington State, it has passed the House,
and is now going to the Senate, where it is expected to pass.
The only drawback is that, they don't have to report a confession,
hopefully we can get that hole patched. Also as a side note,
last June, 2002, another law took affect, that is, it is now
a misdemeanor to leave a child in the care of a known sex
offender. So I'm wondering if an Elder, or Elders knew a man
had been convicted in they're congregation, and they failed
to tell anyone, and they knew a child was being taken care
of by this person, if they would be in violation of this law.
Guess this would be a question for Kim. :) - Charlie |
|
| Dawn |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 4:27 PM |
Jehovah's
Witnesses are morally upstanding people!!!
I am totally disgusted by this website and all its false
information. I am a female 30 yr disfellowshipped JW.
I was born and raised as a JW in Massachusetts. I have NOTHING
but good things to say about my upbringing as a JW and the
people I grew up with. There is No WAY any such behavior
would be tolerated by the JW's. Anyone who would do such
a thing would be ex communicated or "Disfellowshipped" from
the congregation immediately. JW's don't even believe in
sex before marriage let alone sex with a minor or any kind
of abuse to anyone!!! They are kind people with the HIGHEST
of morals of anyone you may encounter. I was 15 when I took
it upon myself to have sex with my boyfriend (who was 17
and NOT a JW but a boy I met in school). I hid this relationship
from everyone and then finally admitted it to my mother
and then to the elders of the congregation. At the time
I did not see the importance abstaining from premarital
sex and just wanted to "fit in" with all my friends at school.
JW's did nothing but try to help me and guide me morally
in the right direction. I was rebellious at the time and
wanted to stay with my bf (which the relationship only lasted
6 months after). I told the elders of the congregation that
I was NOT sorry for my actions and that I wanted to keep
seeing my bf. They gave me the option of repenting, leaving
my bf, and staying a JW or not repenting and being ex-communicated
from the congregation (disfellowshipped). I chose to leave
and be disfellowshipped. The only JWs that were still
allowed to associate with me was my family but of course.
My mother is STILL a JW and I have a wonderful relationship
with her to this day. I totally respect the JW's and their
strict beliefs and morals. They are kind, upstanding, wonderful
people with high morals and giving hearts. They would NOT
tolerate any such behavior as child abuse of any kind. I
find these accusations against JWs absurd and sickening.
After personally speaking to William Bowen I am even more
disgusted by his views with me on the phone. I found myself
stooping to his level by the end of the conversation with
my own words and was beginning to make myself look as bad
as him. I decided to end the conversation before I said
anything I regretted and tried to regain my dignity. The
point being here is that YES, there are some BAD people
in this world. And I can't say that the JW religion is
not without some of them considering how many JWs there
are in the world. Look at Jesus for example: his
apostles were not all good either. . JUDAS fooled everyone
and betrayed JESUS in the end. We are all going to encounter
bad things and bad people. . but this is NOT the fault
or teachings of the JWs. They are not to blame and do
not tolerate this behavior what so ever when it is uncovered.
Lets look at the individuals involved here and not blame
the JW's. (I spoke to this person on the phone in an attempt
to reason with them about this subject. After explaining
from my own personal experience as an elder for many years
as well as the over 1,000 stories posted on this website
that the problem must exist, Dawn chose to say it was all
lies and amounted to a form of racism against JW's. At this
point I stated she appeared to be a stupid person with reasoning
like that. In my opinion anyone who can read 1,000 stories
of abuse in the JW community and say it is nothing but racism
and a lie is a stupid person. On the other hand since this
person has been out of the organization for 14 years I went
on trying and in a kind way explain how wt policy worked.
I offered to let her talk to an abuse survivor with a recent
court case in her area, she refused. I even explained where
she could go on the WT website to find where the policy
is written. When I asked her to read it carefully to understand
how policy orchestrated by home office might put children
in danger, she asked to put me on hold and then never came
back. I gladly put up comments like this and kindly took
her last name off the top. It helps the public to see the
small mindedness of misguided people and someday if Dawn
will educate herself about this topic she may find her comments
quite funny. )silentlambs
| Cynthia |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 6:04 PM |
This site is looking great!
Well Bill, I think you have outdone yourself this time.
The website is fabulous and looks great. Well done!
|
|
| Yehhidah |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 8:00 PM |
Fabulous!
Bill, I love the new look! Great job. God bless all
your hard work. |
|
| Andrew |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 8:35 PM |
Wake up Dawn!
Not too many years ago I would have sympathized with
Dawns' comments about this website containing false
information. However, having come face-to-face with
the ugly realities of a horrendous child abuse issue
with my JW father against all his children and all his
grandchildren while being a publisher, ministerial servant
and elder, and enjoying the protection of the Watchtower
policies and the "yes-men" elders and COs, I now have
a totally different opinion. So many of the abuse victims
on this site have related strikingly similar experiences
with the perps and perp-supporting elders, that I can
only totally believe them. Their stories have the anguished
ring of authenticity. And now I am aware of many other
cases of hushing up the in-congregation abuse issues.
I think as JWs we are trained to be stupid in this way,
and we often don't think for ourselves because of the
conformist mentality that is continually harangued at
the meetings. We tend to block out even reasonable arguments
if they don't totally align with present WT doctrine.
Pompous and dogmatic WT doctrine is another story. Anyway,
I appreciate this website and the ones who are brave
enough to speak the truth about this issue. And if Dawn
thinks it is false information, then she is in effect
calling me a liar. I don't appreciate that. But then
that is the party line that we have so often heard,
right? |
|
| John |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 11:09 PM |
REFRESHING SITE
Greetings to all God's people. I have created this site
www. Charts4Christ. com for your use and enjoyment. Please
visit and sign my guest book. John |
|
| L. B. |
Thursday, March 20, 2003
@ 11:38 PM |
Helping JW's
Someone suggested giving addresses of Jehovah's Witnesses,
so that informative letters about the child abuse issue
could be sent to them. I think that's a great idea.
So many of us couldn't get past the first few words
before getting angrily cut off, but if someone else
did "the dirty work" :-), maybe then these people could
be helped. Maybe then they will listen, will pay attention.
Please let us know if we can start doing this. Thank
you! |
|
| Mag |
Friday, March 21, 2003
@ 7:26 PM |
Nice Job
Love the look of this important site. Keep up the sword
of truth. The evil will not be the victor. |
|
| Dan |
Friday, March 21, 2003
@ 8:13 PM |
Great New Site
I think you are doing some great work and the new site
especially looks great. I was a witness for 8 years
from the age of 15. At the age of 32 I still have nightmares
and I was never sexually abused. I can only imagine
the pain "silent lambs" are going through. Good Luck
to you in all your endeavors. |
|
| Cheri |
Sunday, March 23, 2003
@ 1:47 PM |
An arrogant and ignorant person
Dawn you are just that: an arrogant and ignorant person.
How can you, in good conscience, say that because YOUR
childhood was great, (which is truly a blessing) and
that because in YOUR experience with the JW's there
was none of the same types of incidents, that all of
the thousands of stories here are lies? Do you really
feel that your ONE measly story and experience can
possibly overshadow the thousands here? Do you really
feel comfortable being so extremely arrogant that you
could honestly say that ALL of these stories are perpetrated
by liars? And that since YOUR one story is true that
all the rest are false? In examining these cases with
an open mind and heart, can you honestly say that you
do not feel the pain, shame, tears, anger and sadness
coming from all of these survivors? I am ashamed of
you!! How old are you? I would venture to say that you
are too old to be acting and sounding so very adolescent.
I have to say to you young lady, I am one of those survivors!
I have 3 siblings and EVERY ONE OF US were victims of
sexual abuse and physical abuse at the hands of an elder,
(family friend) a ministerial servant, (step-father)
a publisher, (my father) another publisher, (our mother).
In each case, we children were hushed up. I am the youngest
and the stubbornness and at 14 when I went to the local
police, in Lake Tahoe, California, about the abuse that
I was suffering, I was disfellowshipped for "bringing
reproach upon the name of Jehovah". I'll have you know
that one of my sisters is so mentally ill that she is
beyond human help. She is a diagnosed multiple personality,
and paranoid schizo, (direct result of her extreme sexual
abuse as a 4 year old child) and my other sister is
somewhat mentally ill, (but succeeding in helping herself)
and my brother has withdrawn so far into himself that
no one can reach him. I, thank god, have found this
wonderful site and am finding healing and some help
through this. So Dawn, please do not be so arrogant
and ignorant as to say that you, the one, are the only
honest person to have written to this site as opposed
to the great many here. It really makes you a stupid
person and makes you laughable. Grow up. |
|
| L. B. |
Monday, March 24, 2003
@ 12:41 AM |
Compassion
Hello everyone - - um, I think that all human beings
sometimes say or do 'stupid' things, but that doesn't
make the person stupid. And emotions can be so strong
and overpowering that they can block a person's ability
to be really rational and logical. I don't think Dawn
is 'stupid'. I think that she is just so steeped in
the JW's teachings, so caught up in the organization's
mind games and so on, that it is almost impossible for
her to not to see things in the black and white world
of that religion. Witnesses are being told that former
Witnesses are just lying, and unfortunately, because
of the way people have been indoctrinated, conditioned,
and manipulated by the Watchtower Society, they can't
imagine that there could be flaws in their religion.
I think it is so important to be patient, tolerant,
and even painstakingly gentle and kind with these people.
It is hard to undo all the damage done to people's ability
to reason for themselves. Taking things in little baby
steps with compassion and understanding, with empathy,
can be feel very agonizingly frustrating and exasperating
at times, but it's important to treat Witnesses with
kid gloves. It's not their fault, really, that they
can't truly perceive what seems so clear to others.
They need tender, loving help to gain the correct perspective.
I personally think this 'religion' is really more or
less some kind of pyramid company. I also have a sneaking
suspicion that at the bottom of everything lays a devious,
intimidating scam. I think that it is possible that
the so called 'leaders' of this organization don't really
care that much about their people at all. It is very
sad the way people have been taken in, that when they
become Witnesses somehow the way they think, the way
they perceive things, the way they even feel somehow
gets altered. It's kind of weird. Please, let's all
be patient with each other. Everyone feels this need
to vent, and wherever people are at in their thinking
and emotions, it is a wonderful thing to have freedom
of speech. But when we use this precious gift to speak
out, it's not a good thing to resort to name calling,
unkindness, or any kind of mental and/or mental abuse.
That doesn't help. It just adds fuel to the fire. Please,
let's not step on anyone's toes. It's so hurtful and
demeaning, and demoralizing. And so many people have
been demeaned so much, anyway. Their self-esteem needs
nurturing. You are all precious people, valid human
beings, regardless of your point of view. And all of
you please take good care. |
|
| Sheri |
Monday, March 24, 2003
@ 1:16 PM |
Thank you
Thank you for your help. I saw a television program
regarding this website. The program also profiled a
friend of mind as a child who was sexually abused that
I was not aware of. I thought I was the only one along
with a few friends of mine, but I always suspected that
there were more. As a child, I had a dream that someday
I would get of the world I was in. It was hell on earth!!!
They destroyed my whole family. To this day my mother
is mentally ill. They laugh at mentally ill people.
I know it's not their fault, but this must be stopped!
I saw a lot of people in pain and no where to turn because
there whole family is in this. Who can they trust? My
father has indicated he feels like a bad weed, my brother
is still in it and I have gone through two years of
therapy. I am very happy. I found myself a good husband
and I have discovered I'm like flower in the earth.
I spent most of my life reading self help books and
graduated with honors in the medical field. I feel
strong. . . Help the people. . . I still have a DREAM. .
My dream is not complete. |
|
| J. J. |
Tuesday, March 25, 2003
@ 3:29 AM |
Jehovah's Witnesses encourage
abuse of all kinds
When I was recently attending the kingdom ministry school
of Jehovah's Witnesses one Thursday evening. There
was a part by an elder who was interviewing a witness
that had only been baptized for a little over a year.
The newer witness was a full-time father, full-time
worker for an employer, and an auxiliary pioneer for
multiple months in a row. The witness was considered
an exemplary example to the congregation. The elder
encouraged everybody to follow the same course of action.
Yes spend as much time out in field service as possible,
any damage of neglect to children or family will be
undone in the coming new system. As I sat listening,
I couldn't help but feel sad for the kids of this witness.
I am sure every body who works full-time and has kids
knows the difficulty of spending quality time with them
and there interests. How much more so if you spent an
additional 50 or so hours a month in the field ministry.
This brought back painful memories of my emotionally
abusive and neglectful childhood. You see my father
was that witness spending every available minute in
some sort of service to the watchtower organization.
I was left alone with the wt and awake magazines and
Jehovah to draw close to, but most of the time without
my father. But as a Jehovah's Witnesses I was taught
that the preaching work is the most important thing,
more important than quality time with your children.
And yes I realize that this may not be as severe as
sexual abuse, but it has brought many painful feelings
and unhappiness in my own life. So yes what Jehovah's
Witnesses portray in there publications about family
life and what actually happens, and maybe not in all
families, is two different things. My dad knows the
watchtower bible and tract society by heart to the point
of dying, but he has yet to know real love. |
|
| L. B. |
Tuesday, March 25, 2003
@ 1:27 PM |
Self-help books
Hi, I'd like to recommend a couple of really good books
to everyone. One of them is 'Please Stop Laughing at. . . One
Woman's Inspirational Story', by Jodee Blanco. Ms. Blanco
is very successful in her career, but she had a miserable
childhood, due to bullying from classmates from elementary
school through high school. It seems like it would be
a really good book for people who were abused in any
way in the Jehovah's Witness religion. The other book
is 'Surrendering To Yourself. . . You Are Your Own Soul
Mate', by Iris Krasnow. On the back cover of the book
it says, "Once you come to know who you really are,
you are ready for anything". This is a good book for
everyone! It's an inspiring book for people of all ages,
no matter who they are, etc. I hope you all check them
out! Amazon. com could give you more information on them.
Take care and hang in there. |
|
| L. B. |
Tuesday, March 25, 2003
@ 2:44 PM |
Whoops!
I just sent in a post a while ago about a couple of
books. It looks like I better proof read before I send
out e-mails! The book by Jodee Blanco is, 'Please Stop
Laughing at Me. . . One Woman's Inspirational Story'. The
other book is 'Surrendering To Yourself. . . You Are Your
Own Soul Mate', by Iris Krasnow. Again, I highly recommend
these inspiring self-help books! |
|
|
Tuesday, March 25, 2003
@ 6:20 PM |
Getting the word out
I have a niece who is a Jehovah's Witness. Her husband
is not a Witness and doesn't seem to be very open to
the religion - - at least, so far. I have been 'forbidden'
to say anything to him that might be encouraging his
wariness and reluctance to get involved in the Jehovah's
Witnesses. My niece is hoping that he will eventually
come around, and I am not "allowed" to contact him.
I'm thinking that if he knew about silentlambs, if he
knew more about the facts about the religion, he might
be able to help her! Maybe if he had more information
on which to base his stand, he could help her to get
a more clear view. As much as she wants him to not be
swayed by former Witnesses, I want him to not be swayed
by the Witnesses! That doesn't feel right to me. I am
pretty much in a stuck place and feel helpless and frustrated.
Is it possible someone could write to him and other
people who can't be contacted, because of any repercussions
that might occur if family members or friends, who are
former Witnesses, were to contact them. I feel a little
at my wit's end sometimes over this situation. Help!
|
|
| LM |
Tuesday, March 25, 2003
@ 9:21 PM |
USED CAR
Imagine I am a salesman at a car lot. Your niece's husband
comes to my car lot. I tell him these awesome things
about my used cars and history and about a particular
car I want to sell him. When he says he wants to think
it over and check out other used lots. I immediately
tell him not to. I think of every reason in the book
why he needs to immediately buy a car from my lot. You'll
lose a great deal and be disappointed in the long run.
Don't waste your time they will just say something negative
about my car lot. Now, if anyone buys a car from me,
without checking in to my history the bad and the good,
is that person not an idiot? You see, truth never changes,
no matter what I say or you say or anyone says. The
truth is the truth. Now in all probability, if I really
had the confidence that my cars were the best for the
best deals in town, I would encourage you to go out
and find a better deal. I would be proud when you came
back after failed attempts. But if I didn't have the
confidence in my deals, I would do everything possible
to persuade you from hearing or thinking anything contrary
or negative to what I say and immediately get you committed
to a deal. In actuality that may or may not be the best
deal for your niece's husband. But the important point
is to make informed decision's, the only way you can
do that is to hear the good, the bad, and the ugly.
|
|
|
Wednesday, March 26, 2003
@ 6:22 PM |
Used Car
Wow, you're good! :-) Thank you. I agree, that the truth
is the truth, no matter what. If someone is so sure,
so confident that what they have is the truth, they
wouldn't have any problem with someone checking out
other options and choices. I think my niece's husband
is very wise to be so careful. Thank you again for such
a great response! |
|
| LM |
Wednesday, March 26, 2003
@ 11:03 PM |
There is comfort in knowing I
am not alone, thank you
I too, was abused by someone in the "organization".
I remember going to an assembly at the age of 13 where
they talked about being an accomplice if you knew that
someone had done something wrong and had kept it a secret.
I was baptized when I was 12, so I felt a huge "moral"
obligation to tell the elders what had happened to me.
The person who abused me was my uncle so I expected
that my speaking out would cause a huge rift in my family
but I also expected to be protected. Much to my surprise
the one who was protected was him. I have no words to
describe how humiliated and ashamed I was made to feel.
I sought counseling and filed a police report and the
perpetrator was arrested as a result, only to be bailed
out by the very elder I had trusted the most, the one
I had the courage to confide in. As in any trauma you
don't get over it, you just learn to live with it. Although
this happened 20 years ago it truly is more difficult
to deal with than the abuse itself. |
|
| Ian |
Thursday, March 27, 2003
@ 10:08 AM |
Admiration
It takes real courage to do what you have done, Bill.
It takes even greater courage for the abused to come
forward and tell their stories. My family and I are
fortunate, we have never experienced such abuse. My
wife and I were JWs for 15 years. We brought our four
children up in the teachings. Six weeks ago, after having
amassed so much evidence of deceit, lies and false prophesying,
my wife, two sons and I left the organization. Our two
daughters, however, have stayed. The older is married
and the younger one left home because of our stance.
Incredibly and heartbreakingly, both now shun us and
not one of our "friends" has been in touch! The Watchtower
is an evil organization that destroys families. My own
family, previously so strong and loving, has been torn
apart. I admire and applaud what is being achieved here
- and elsewhere - to expose the organization for what
it truly is. I live in England, but the love we exJWs
have permeates the globe. And you know what, it's REAL
love. God bless you all. United, we SHALL be victorious.
|
|
| Nik |
Thursday, March 27, 2003
@ 7:26 PM |
There's no recovery for ex-JWs
I have heard stories like the ones of Silent Lambs before,
not even on message boards but from real JWs. I've heard
of people being molested and the JWs not reporting it,
and I've even heard of a girl who was raped at a JW
party but it was kept from the police & never went
to court. For Dawn- for all the "Dawns" out there, I
cannot believe that someone could be so brainwashed,
so completely controlled to not see the evil that can
be produced from certain organizations. I do not intend
to be labeled an "apostate," for I love God very much,
I would never intentionally work against Him. However,
these people automatically label one as such when any
questioning comes into play. When I became a teenager,
shortly after I left the "truth" I fell into drug abuse,
dangerous sex, and many other horrible truly worldly
things. I prayed that God would find me (though I didn't
think he even existed for many years) and help me out
of the hole I had put myself in. Last summer I found
God again and my heart was washed clean, however, I
felt the Witness's weren't correct and didn't go back.
To this day, though I cannot fully remember, I believe
that I was molested by someone in this organization.
I've tried desperately to recall who did this, I have
faint memories, but apparently it's been blocked out
of my mind. The fact that I was abused- I could eventually
deal with that. What I cannot deal with, is the idea
that my family and everyone who I thought was a friend
hates me because I don't believe in these teachings
which are proving to be so faulty. I will never be accepted
by my mother, not only that but all the years spent
growing up as a JW has left me emotionally scarred and
dead inside. If it wasn't for my father who isn't a
JW, my wonderful fiancee�, and the fact that God came
into my life and gave me back my faith in Him, I surely
would have already put a gun to my head. I am now dealing
with the scars of being a JW, scars I didn't even realize
existed until I left, and am currently trying to find
friends and a new church to attend with REAL Christians.
Regardless of how I feel and my personal pain, I want
to tell every single member of the silentlambs and otherwise
that my heart goes out to them. I believe that more
and more everyday, holes are being punched through the
doctrine of the JWs and their facade is growing thin.
Hopefully, one day all will be exposed to everyone in
the organization and everyone can be put on the path
to a healthy recovery and a new found correct faith
in God. Again, I do not mean to steer anyone away from
their beliefs- I am NOT an anti-Christ, I am not "Apostate,"
I simple want the truth. I want God in my life, and
not false hope and empty propaganda. I pray for everyone-
I pray for myself. Thank you for this site, it has helped
to open my eyes. |
|
| Claudine |
Thursday, March 27, 2003
@ 10:00 PM |
Absolutely beautiful web site! I got the Germany transcript
today and thought that I would give it to the elders,
so that they can see how to not get caught in this trap
of two witnesses or a REPENTANT child molester-yeah
right! I think someone else suggested it also, so I
don't claim it to be an original idea. Maybe, one of
them will see the light and protect a child! The congregation
is Upper Lake, California and I know that there is a
history of child molestation, unreported, ignored and
the molester died without ever being disfellowshipped.
It has ruined lives. My love and God's Blessings to
each and every one of you! Love, Claudine |
|
| P. C. Ireland |
Saturday, March 29, 2003
@ 5:36 PM |
Thank You
Just a note to say "thank you". Your courage is great
and you are doing a great service to people who could
not speak up for themselves, because they have been
destroyed by this treacherous organization ! How dare
they claim to represent God on this earth!! What does
Jehovah think of their policy on paedophiles ? Would
he want dirt swept under the carpet in order to keep
his organization 'CLEAN'? Why would Jehovah need that?
What would Jesus have done about paedophiles ? I do
know that he loved children . We must continue to protect
the innocence and vulnerability of our precious children
. How dare they suggest that there should be two witnesses
to a child rape!! And that this is one of Jehovah's
rulings!! Isn't everything witnessed by God himself??
Is He not regarded as a witness??? Do these people who
run this organization think we are all stupid ?? As
you can probably see , they make my blood BOIL!! I consider
myself very fortunate to have escaped from their grasp.
I console myself with the teachings of Jesus Christ
with two of his teachings in particular, when he said
of his true followers "by their fruit you will know
them" ; and also my real reassurance; "you will come
to know the truth and the truth will set you free". . . . . . . . and
it did! Thank you, Yours Sincerely,P. C. Ireland |
|
| Paul |
Saturday, March 29, 2003
@ 10:10 PM |
The JWs offered me a young girl!
When 19 years old a JW elder tried to entice me into
the congregation with the promise to marry a young JW
girl. The elder pointed to a 13 year old girl standing
by her mother. The mother of the girl smiled and said,"he
sure looks handsome. Don't you think so Becky?" The
poor little girl just blushed and agreed with her stupid
mother. I called the elder and mother "pimps. " I find
that most religions are for the weak, either in mind
and/or body. They use the religions as a crunch,or hide
behind it as they wear a mask preventing people to see
them for what they really are, monsters. I've friends
that commit sins all the time and then ask for forgiveness
from god after, just so they can commit the same sin
again. . . DON'T EVER ONYONE OF YOU BE A COWERED! BE DILIGENT
IN ASSERTIVNESS, AND REPORT ALL PERVERTS. |
|
| C. T. |
Monday, March 31, 2003
@ 1:33 AM |
Anyone else from Rosemont congregation
Alexandria, VA around 1967 to 1971?
I have spent my adult life trying to deal with the effects
of my JW elder father's abuse. There has been tremendous
healing in my life and tremendous difficulty. I am 40
and have been out of touch with my parents for years
(my parents who initially shunned me after I left the
J. W. 's at 16 and started sleeping w/ my boyfriend at
17--and who now say nothing ever happened. ) I thought
I was hallucinating when I started having flashbacks
at age 30, although they clarified the reasons for my
repeated struggles with depression and suicidal/ self
injuring impulses. What I want to ask is, is there anyone
else visiting this site who experienced abuse by J. W. 's
involved in the Rosemont congregation (no longer extant)in
Alexandria, VA during the late 60's to early 70's, or
the Manassas, VA congregation in the 1970's, or for
that matter, in the Longwood or Altamonte Springs, FL
congregations in the 1980's? I have been able to verify
some details tied to some of my flashbacks, but other
troubling flashbacks involving other JW's seem too farfetched
to be believed. |
|
|
Monday, March 31, 2003
@ 11:11 PM |
Good lord :|
You guys don't know anything about the witnesses so
stop thinking you do. You are all stupid. :| |
|
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